Grief is different for everyone
Each person will grieve differently and experience a range of emotions, including sadness, anger, shock, regret, relief, isolation, numbness, hopelessness and irritability. These may be unusual for you, but are all normal reactions to loss.
These emotions can come and go, and are sometimes triggered by events and memories. Immediately after losing someone is usually the most emotional period. You may find yourself:
- Going through the motions of daily life
- Experiencing changes in your thinking or your physical health, and
- Surrounding yourself with people or just wanting to be alone.
There’s no right or wrong way to grieve, and however you experience grief, it’s important to take the space and time you need. You’ll progressively heal and return to your routines, create new experiences and build new ways to manage your loss.
Find ways to work through grief
One of the hardest parts of grief is not knowing what to expect, especially in the first few months. It’s a very individual experience with no set pattern, so figuring out what to do isn’t always clear.
Dealing with your feelings
Bereavement involves processing emotions and creating meaning out of your loss. It can involve redefining yourself and your place in the world. There’s no magical formula to moving forward, but avoiding pain and sadness can lead to emotional and physical problems later on. Allow yourself to feel the full impact of your loss so you can move forward over time.
How long it takes to grieve can vary from person to person. It’s important not to feel guilty or question how long it takes you or others to grieve. As you eventually begin to re-engage with your routine, you will slowly experience a greater sense of hope, focusing more on the future rather than the loss itself. Eventually, memories can become a positive point of reflection rather than a trigger of sadness.
Many circumstances can influence how you cope with loss and how you express your emotions:
- Your existing level of wellbeing
- Your relationship with the person who has passed
- The events surrounding their death
- Other cultural factors
Some people grieve for months, while for others it may be years.
